SCOTUS Denies Same Sex Marriage Certs, Legal Majority Of US

[John Galt]

[Edarmoc]

[John Galt]

[exploited]

A Hypothetical Conversation on The Nature of Marriage by Two Esteemed Gentlemen, Mr. John "Garry" Galt and Mr. Exploited

A grimy basement gay club in Minneapolis. The lighting is dim and the crowd is thick. The TVs above the urinal in the mixed gender bathrooms are playing The Rocky Horror Picture Show on repeat, soundlessly. Lady Gaga blasts in the background. John "Garry" Galt walks through the bathroom door.

Covered in glitter, and irritated by the fake eyelashes, John Galt is a 30-something IT guy with a fetish for ladyboy stockings, which he has paired with a short animal-print skirt and a mesh tanktop. His hair is feathered. He glides to the urinal, pulls down his skirt, and carefully removes his penis from his asshole, grunting as his flacid, bruised rooster spills urine onto the floor.

Enter Exploited. His eyes immediately spot the growing piss puddle on the floor beneath that chicks feet. He notices the... lady pissing on the floor is staring at him. Grimacing, he takes a urinal four stalls away, careful to avoid the strangers watchful gaze.

JGG: "I can't help but notice you have a small dick. That's unfortunate. Have you considered having a new one grown for you?'

E: "I'm sorry, what?" (shocked)

JGG: "I'm just saying that marriage is defined as a man and a woman, so telling two men they can't change the definition of marriage doesn't violate the equal protection clause. They should get GARRIED NOT MARRIED HAHAHAAH!"

E: "..."

John Galt's face has gone red, and his breath is short. He doesn't even notice that he is peeing on his own leg. He is practically yelling.

JGG: "I would know better than anyone. 2% unemployment in my career field. Doing the good deed during the day, and the dirty deed at night, when I become 'Johniffer.' Marriage is for a man and a wife, and I won't have these fags thinking they can just redefine the word. Not when I got a pretty wife sitting at home, with no idea that I'm here or that the gays are ruining our institution!"

E: "..."

JGG: "AND FOR THAT MATTER, WHAT IS WITH THE GOVERNMENT TELLING ME WHAT MARRIAGE IS ANYWAYS?! MARRIAGE IS DEFINED BY GOD AND NOT BY THE DISGUSTING FAILURES OF A SINGLE MAN."

John Galt falls onto the floor weeping. Exploited gags and tries to step over the man's shaking body. When he does, the man reaches out, grabbing Exploited's leg with his piss-soaked hands.

JGG:

Fin.

[John Galt]

i would never wear animal print

[Edarmoc]

[John Galt]

no, because the law expressely said they couldn't intermarry. most laws (until very recently when someone came up with this novel idea of garriage and subverted the meaning of marriage by proclaiming it was somehow the same) did not even think to exclude males from "marrying" other males because that didn't make any sense. when lawmakers did make changes it was to solidify the standard understanding of it. i mean we don't form pair bonds for no reason. hmmm what could it be hmmmm could it be related to two sexes? jesus christ man i never thought of that

[Edarmoc]

[The Dude]

[The Dude]