Sex, Monogamy and Relationships

[eynon81]

[exploited]

[J.K. Gregg]

My thoughts on sex. Well, honestly, I haven't really explored sex intellectually all that much, so this post will be just as much an expose of my feelings on sex to all of you as it is to me. I guess my initial evaluation of my views on sex would land me in the "conservative" column, but let me hash this out a bit more.

In my opinion, sex has a spiritual component. Sex to me is more than just a physical act; it's exposing yourself in the most vulnerable of ways to another person in pursuit of the most exquisite pleasure the human body can offer. Yes, this can be achieved simply by "going through the motions" but it can be so, so much better. Sex devoid of romantic love seems so empty and fleeting; empty in that it lacks the well-earned trust and emotional bond that exists with romantic love, and fleeting in that the pleasure it brings emotionally is temporary. I think that's why many surveys conclude that people in committed relationships have more rewarding sex than people who have less meaningful sex with less meaningful people. You have to ask yourself, wouldn't any rational person benefit far more from a form of sex that includes a strongly life-serving psychological dimension (companionship, admiration, intense affinity for shared values mutually understood), than from one that doesn't?

So because I think sex has a spiritual component as well as a physical component, I see sex as one of the most treasured gifts I could ever give to anyone, and not just anyone, the one person that I trust the most, admire the most, cherish the most, and have the strongest bond with: my wife. We give each other our most raw forms, our most raw emotions under an umbrella of trust. It is the most rewarding experience I've come across.

[exploited]

Why does the act of having spiritually connected sex necessarily exclude also having sex with other people?

For instance, I have best friends, and I have close friends, and then I have acquaintances. Obviously having best friends is better than close friends, and close friends better than acquaintances... but I wouldn't argue that any of those relationships rely upon the exclusion of others. Why is sex different?

[Darkhorse]

[J.K. Gregg]

Well I don't necessarily think that sex should be confined to two people. People can be in love with and cherish multiple people. Personally, I can't relate, but if other people are romantically involved with multiple people, and everyone is honest and upfront about their feelings, then I see no reason why sex can't be enjoyed with multiple people.

[J.K. Gregg]

[exploited]

[Darkhorse]

Only so people don't discover your secret.

[J.K. Gregg]